One of the hardest parts about having a baby is naming it.
Okay, maybe, maybe not.
But it has proven to be quite a complicated process for us.
Most people probably don't view my husband as a Man of Strong Opinions. He's not one to talk about his opinions; he just lives them. His opinions are not usually loud or flowery, but they run 3 miles deep, like the roots of a well-established tree.
My opinions, on the other hand, are more like the leaves. They're not afraid of being seen or heard, and they blow with the breeze. When the seasons change, they die and flutter to the ground, forgotten. When the seasons change, new ones are established, they hold fast while they last, and then they also flutter away, with only a few stubborn ones remaining.
How does this relate to naming our children? Well, a lot, actually.
He has his rules; I have mine (although some of my ideas have blown away with the wind, there are a few that have stubbornly hung on). Here is a list of that combination:
Rule #1) The name must give the child a unique identity.
Challenge- Last name: Miller
Every town had a mill. Every mill had a Miller. The area we live must have had a dozen mills! That's my theory.
Rule #2) You must be able to say the name by looking at it.
Rule #3) You must be able to make a good guess at the spelling, by hearing it.
Rule #4) The name must not be shared by any hard-to-relate-to former coworkers, sketchy relatives, or other persons who make us squirm at their very remembrance.
Rule #5) First name must not start with a B. (It's an initials thing; I'll leave it at that, initially.)
How this looks in reality is that I read lists of names and watch his face. If his eyebrows raise or his nose wrinkles (I can usually "hear" their reaction without even looking up), I know it's a no-go. He reads lists of names. Of course, he starts with the B names, because there are so many lovely ones. I just glare; he laughs, tells me I shouldn't be so picky, and moves on. Soon, he falls asleep, and the discussion waits another 2 months. Give or take.
Somehow, we have managed to name three boys that we still like (the boys AND their names).
We have chosen not to get too wrapped up in name meanings, because, while we DO believe it's important to not name your child intentionally after something/someone evil, we also believe that name meanings are fairly flexible. We have maybe had moments of regret for naming one child a name that means "stubborn"-- although the name itself probably has little bearing on his personality, and we prefer to interpret it as "determined."
We were informed by the dental assistants in the family that one of our boys bears the name of the Dental Dummy. Oops. Good things we didn't know before he was born, or it might not have passed. But we still like his name.
Our middle names have been pretty straight forward, so far: Daddy, Grandpa #1, Grandpa #2.
Now we have plumb run out of Grandpas and Daddys, so we're stuck on a middle name, too.
With the first one, we had a boy's name envelope and a girl's name envelope. I forget how we did it with the second one (probably the same). After the third one was born, and they asked for his name, we looked at each other and said, "Is that what we're going with?" It was, and we did.
Since Baby is anticipated in about 2 months (and we just had our bimonthly discussion), I'm getting a little nervous. Craig is sure the child will have a name.
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I'm eager to hear how other couples name their children....
1) Is it primarily up to one of you to name them, or do both of you have opinions?
2) What rules do you have for naming your children?
3) And--of course--if you have suggestions for us, we're willing to listen! If we USE your suggestion, you might win, I don't know, a pack of beef sticks or something, when you come to visit the baby and bring a casserole.
(I had to strikethrough that, because it felt a little Bart Rathbone-ish, but I left it because I thought it was funny-ish, in the cultural context of Mennonitism).
